A few weeks ago I was sitting in my bed looking out of the window, appreciating the nature in my garden, the green trees with blossom and the birds chattering away to each other and I had a terrible cold. My eyes and nose were running and my body was achy and tired. I had the flu and I needed rest.
It was time to rest and take care of myself
I was so grateful for the care that others offered me. Kind words from my sister and daughter and on the cooker downstairs, bubbling away there was a small saucepan of fresh lemons, oranges, cloves and ginger, which my friend prepared for me before she left the house to go shopping.
Rest is for wimps
Last week I saw a statement on a social platform that read: “rest is for wimps”. I was surprised when I read this and it reminded me of a time when I may have thought this too.
In my 30’s and 40’s, I was a working mum, an MD leading a company working full-time, as well as taking care of young children and relatives that were unwell. I remember feeling overwhelmed, exhausted and tense and yet I soldiered on, detrimentally overriding my instinct to rest. I would tell myself I had to keep going and I congratulated myself on having an incredible resilience to stress. People used to say to me they were amazed that I could hold so much!
When I stopped to take a holiday; I remember that often, during the first few days of rest, my body was triggered into intense recovery, a clear sign that I hadn’t listened to my need for rest earlier. Thankfully, this is a long time ago now and I now know how to tune-in and listen to the language my body speaks and so I don’t do that anymore.
I’d like to live a long life
I’d like to enjoy being fully present with experience and I’ve learnt that this requires me to enjoy the pleasure of rest as well as an activity!
When we hold so much and juggle so many balls, it can seem impossible to find time to rest. Many people don’t have the support they need to share the load and asking for support can be embarrassing because we think we should be able to cope.
To be honest, this is how I felt during this earlier period of my life. It wasn’t until my mum became so unwell that I couldn’t care for her myself anymore, and my teenagers were up to all sorts of things that filled my anxiety, that I knew something needed to shift.
Overriding a need for rest causes imbalance
Our adrenaline becomes high so that we can manage and so we keep going. The problem here is if we continue without quality breaks and time to restore (and I don’t just mean sleeping at night), our immune system can become weakened and our health can be seriously impacted.
If you feel yourself speeding up, slow down!
It’s important to tip the scales. Resting releases acetyl-choline which reduces the levels of adrenaline and helps the body soften and restore. This process became very obvious to me during my Biodanza teacher training, which is where I learnt more about the human instincts, biology and our human potential to live in the fullness of life.
When we plan a Biodanza Vivencia (which is a series of exercises to music that evokes emotional states) we work to restore balance through vitality, flow and relaxation as well as to heighten our sensitivity to the language our body speaks.
Enjoying the pleasure of rest, awakens our mammalian instincts for nurturing, care, play and affection and our connection with others become the priority.
Rest feeds and strengthens our internal systems and works in a mutually supportive way, collaborating for our wellbeing — rest is definitely not for “wimps”
Balance supports and strengthens us in a way that ensures our physical, emotional and mental resilience so that we emerge as strong leaders rooted in compassion and ability to collaborate with others in the external world.
Darwin said;
In the long history of humankind (and animal kind, too) those who learned to collaborate and improvise most effectively have prevailed.
Here are a few suggestions for enjoying the pleasure of rest.
- Commit to change
- Embrace one thing you love about yourself each day
- Stretch, sigh, yawn, raise your arms and open your chest, relaxing
- Get a hug
- Take a nap
- Go to sleep before midnight when in natural darkness without electrical equipment close by
- When you are tired sleep
- When the project your working on feels too much, go for a walk
- Trust yourself – listen to the language that your body speaks – you know what will benefit you most
- Remember that slowing down can mean that you will be much more effective and your biochemistry will love you for it
- Examine your resistance to connecting with the qualities that come with sensitivity and your need for rest. Ask what it is that keeps you striving and hardening the arteries of your heart?
- When you feel the need to speed up slow down.
Is something missing?
If you have some suggestions I’d love to hear them.
Maybe some of you would like to come and take some rest with me in Greece this year? ‘Dance With Life‘ is a holistic holiday where you can enjoy experiencing the wisdom of your body and the compassionate workings of your heart and mind though Biodanza and NVC (nonviolent communication) whilst enjoying the local cuisine and culture and spending time with like-minded people.
Challenging the notion that “rest is for wimps” reveals a profound misunderstanding of rest’s true power. It’s akin to underestimating the calm before a storm, where the stillness gathers strength for what’s to come. I once viewed rest through a lens of skepticism, associating it with lost productivity. However, an enforced period of rest following an illness taught me its intrinsic value. In that quietude, I found clarity and creativity I had never known, leading to breakthroughs in personal and professional projects that had previously stumped me. This experience shifted my perspective, making me an advocate for the strategic and mindful embrace of rest. It’s not just about stopping; it’s about recalibrating, recharging, and returning stronger.
Hi Rye I completely agree – recalibrating, recharging, and returning stronger. Restoring, Renewing, Integrating.