I was initiated into mindfulness from a young age by my parents who meditated every day.
Dropping into stillness in our family was as normal as speaking, listening to music, singing and dancing. On Sundays, my younger brother and I attended the children’s Philosophy School. We practised meditation, appreciation of art and nature and took long walks in Hyde Park.
We joined the adult classes after our dad died. I guess us going supported our mum, she could attend her group and didn’t worry about us needing childcare.
It didn’t feel like the “right” place for us to be. We were the only children in a group of about 20 adults.
In this group, meditation was central to coming together, the tutor showed diagrams and spoke of higher consciousness. My brother and I tuned-out of talks. We drew pictures and took part in the meditations. I remember feeling blissful. It felt like I could fly!
I remember the smell, taste and texture of homebaked brown bread, cheese, honey, apples and Ribena was incredible after the meditation
Can an early introduction to mindful practice support us in our lives?
It’s difficult to say if the early introduction supported me in my life. Maybe it set me on a seekers path – a journey into being curious about consciousness. Did I develop equanimity, I’m not sure I did?
The risk, pleasure and pain I experienced during my teenage years, was emotionally turbulent. My behaviour could be extreme.
Mum tried to calm me with words of comfort, reminding me to breathe and sometimes she suggested that “I was not the emotion” which was a challenging concept for me to understand. It didn’t help me to feel better either! Meditation did sometimes help me to escape my reality. It helped me to transcend and connect to a higher presence. And, not to be present at times, with the depth of my sorrow. It gave me comfort, as did a belief in the existence of a loving God.
I learnt how to move trapped emotion and integrate memories.
Many years of personal development and embodied mindful practice has enabled me to accept fear, anxiety, sadness and embrace joy. I learnt how to move trapped emotion and integrate memories in a way that I could be present with myself in the fullness of my power with stories to share.
NVC taught me to observe my thoughts and transform judgements into self-compassion.
After a long journey and much practice, I became mindful.
What is mindfulness?
It could be described as:
- A way to find peace within ourselves amidst the chaos that surrounds us.
- Being consciously aware of the present moment – what is happening within ourselves, thoughts, feelings, sensations etc., and around us.
- Unconditional acceptance, simply being present with what is now.
- A connection with the power of the heart
One young person told me recently
It’s cool to be mindful
Jon Kabat-Zinn, a Professor of Medicine Emeritus and creator of the Stress Reduction Clinic and the Center for Mindfulness in Medicine, Health Care, and Society at the University of Massachusetts Medical School says
Mindfulness is presence of heart.
The roots of mindfulness come from ancient teachings for personal transformation, liberation and enlightenment.
Jon has been instrumental in introducing mindfulness into the mainstream through his tried and tested programmes.
Corporations have seen it as a way to increase productivity — through customer relations, care, and collaboration in teamwork. I recently worked with a multi-national corporation to roll-out ‘Empathy Factor’ training where mindfulness was part of a programme that will impact millions of people.
In therapeutic settings, the purpose of mindfulness is to alleviate symptoms of stress and in educational settings, it is used to help improve concentration and to impact the wellbeing of children.
Mindfulness is now available through the mainstream and alongside much research about its’ positive outcomes there is concern around its simplification and commercialisation.
Here are a few articles highlighting matters for consideration:
Is the push to teach meditation in schools just a way to mould shiny corporate humanoids?
What mindfulness has become? Read here
Research outcomes from mindfulness programmes in schools. Read here
Mindfulness has got people talking about “being awake” regulating stress, supporting mental health and wellbeing.
My hope is that the underpinning principles of the Buddhist eightfold path of right speech, right action and right livelihood, with awareness of ethical actions of the well-being, are not forgotten. My hope is that we prepare our children well for living and contributing to this complex world.
I love the comprehensive work of Daniel J. Siegel, on whole brain integration from a clinical professor of psychiatry at the UCLA School of Medicine and Executive Director of the Mindsight Institute.
Actresses Goldie Hawn and Ruby Wax OBE, are also both advocates for mindfulness with brain science.
Goldie Hawn says: “When I started The Hawn Foundation I was driven to bring a solution to our children who were suffering from high levels of stress and who were completely lacking the skills to navigate in a complex world. I was moved by the statistics about the increases in school violence and bullying, youth depression and suicide, and I was concerned about the persistent failure of the education system to help children cope and flourish “
Mandala said, “I believe that education is the most powerful weapon which we can use to change the world.”
Can practicing mindfulness in school make a difference?
I think it can offer a pragmatic approach towards cultivating nonviolence – a form of ‘peace education’ that may be effective
This might include:
- Teaching children about the way their brains work and how their body regulates;
- Raising levels of dopamine through everyday dancing and singing and rebalancing adrenaline with activities of relaxation and rest to release acetylcholine;
- Replacing punitive approaches to non-compliance with empathic dialogue and restorative practice;
- Fostering mindsets and practices for collaboration instead of competition.
- Review processes for exclusion – commit to inclusion.
A child’s body forms freely in its early years and when instructed to undertake an activity by an appropiate adult they do so with an assumed place of safety and empathy.
Meditation can be a useful space in which children can harness that freeness however I feel it comes with a notable caveat and that being that they need an opportunity to opt out or pursue an activity that they feel which may be more in keeping with their own internal mindset should they decide to. I say this because as our (western) society is so littered with mixed messages – exercise and eat well, over study and over examine – the structure of our adult lives means we live and work unsociable hours and in turn contradict those ‘healthy’ tips.
Each child progresses at a different rate and so a large dose of empathy would need to be taken into account when delivering classes of ‘meditation’ or ‘mindfulness’.
No child is a ‘natural’ at sport, painting, music playing or dancing – their competency comes through hours, days, weeks and months of regular practice and allied to this is the space in which they feel free to express themselves.
If a child does not want to participate in an activity then providing an alternative (or several options) needs to be considered so as not to exclude them from friends or group. i.e they need to feel free to do what they want in the manner that they choose.
Giving them the space to be themselves within the time of a prescribed activity whether that be ‘sport’, ‘dance’, ‘meditation’ or ‘mindfulness’ needs to be uppermost when considering sessions for young people. It gives them the space to grow with confidence – the successful and happiest people are the ones who confidentally demostrate a child-like persona as they have never let it go from within themselves. Brave, fearless, free and open.
Thanks for taking the time to comment and to highlight how important it is for children’s choices, unique preferences, inclinations and talents to be honoured 🙂